4 Things to Consider If Your are Thinking About Divorce

1. Divorce as a last resort:

Marriages can survive many things. It is a good idea to consider marriage counseling to determine whether you and your spouse can get past the issues that are bogging down your marriage. Sometimes financial counseling is appropriate. However, if you decide that divorce is inevitable, you should consider several issues before you jump into divoorce.

2. Children's issues - What to Consider:

How can you minimize the trauma to your children of experiencing your divorce?

How do you anticipate sharing your time with your children?

How will you support the children?

Most experts believe that keeping the children's routine intact is very important. That is, the children should be able to stay in their own rooms, in their own homes, with their own pets and they should continue to attend their usual schools. That said, the law provides now that both parents should spend "substantial time" with their children and establish a time sharing schedule that is in the children's best interests. There are, of course, times when "substantial time sharing" is not in the best interests of your children. If your spouse is violent or if your spouse abuses alcohol or other drugs, these facts might justify more limited contact by the other parent. It is very important that you discuss your concerns with your attorney from the beginning so that he or she can address your issues in your Petition (the first pleading in your divorce case) and advise you on preserving evidence.

If you are considering divorce and you have children, you should not move out of your home without the children for any length of time if you hope to be the parent who has the majority time sharing with the children, ultimately. Moving out of the marital home with the children can also be risky, because the Court may consider that you have disrupted your children's stability. It is very important that you speak with a qualified family law attorney about whether or not you should move out of the familly home, with or without your children.

3. Supporting the children:

Prior to meeting with your attorney, you should gather together the following financial documents:

Paycheck stubs for you and your spouse

Joint tax returns, both personal and business returns

Documentation of assets, especially bank accounts, retirement accounts and other assets.

Both parties are required to contribute to the support of their children. Child support is based upon a calculation which takes into account the following factors:

The net income of the Father

The net income of the Mother

The number of children

Child care costs

Health insurance costs

Time sharing plan, including the number of overnights that each parent spends with each child

The Florida Child Support Guidelines established by the Florida Legislature.

4. Violence in the home:

If your spouse is being violent, you can apply to the Court for an "Injunction for Protection", which is a court order requiring one person to vacate the home you share. However, if you claim that there is violence and the Court does not believe you, this can cause other problems. For this reason, violent incidents should be documented thoroughly by (a) reporting violence to the proper authorities (b) seeking medical care for treatment and documentation, (c) you should photograph injuries to yourself or damage to property, (d) you should share the facts about episodes of violence with trusted friends or family members. Remember that if your children are exposed to domestic violence, they are more likely to either be an abuser or to put up with an abuser later in life. A person applies for an injunction at the office of the Clerk of the Court. At this time, there is no charge for applying for such an injunction.

Getting prepared:

If you are "thinking about divorce", you should be thinking first and foremost of getting as much information as you can about your family's financial situation. Gather together tax returns for the last several years; paycheck stubs of both parties; bank statements and bills for household expenses. You will need the social security numbers and dates of birth of both you and your spouse and your children's dates of birth.